I recently re-watched Kick-Ass. Mostly because Hit-Girl is pretty much my hero. Whenever she fights, it makes me want to jump on things and do some serious damage.
There's a scene in the movie where Kick-Ass's love interest thinks he's gay. He plays along because he wants to get close to her. That scumbag. Then there's a scene where she's like...Oh, I've always wanted a friend like you. And he gets confused and he's like...what do you mean? And she says something about how he's gay. When he brings it up to his friends, one of them says something about how his love interest has always wanted a gay best friend.
Wait. What? We do? Is this true? Do other girls also want gay best friends? Maybe? I don't know. I've never walked into a gay bar and pointed at a gay guy whose fashion sense is much better than mine and said, "Hey you. You're going to be my gay best friend." It's hard enough making just ONE friend.
No, I don't have anything against gay guys. Ultimately, they're still guys. And it's hard for me to even be friends with guys in general. What do you talk about with guys?
Sports? But I only really enjoy college sports. Okay I lied. I like Jeremy Lin and Adrian Peterson.
Music? Ugh, can't we just listen to music together and not talk?
Computers? I don't know anything about computers. I only know how to use the Intermawebz.
Cars? Ever since I stopped driving, I stopped caring about cars.
Muffin tops? I only like eating muffin tops. I don't know if I could talk about them for too long.
Considering I act like this, it's safe to say that I shouldn't talk to guys. Any guy. Period.
Side note: Once, a guy told me that it was difficult for him to be friends with women. When I asked him why, he said it was because they were boring. Personally, I think the same can be said of men.
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I should say that I do have guy friends. But when I think about it...they're usually there to drag my face home after a night of debauchery. If I ask what they were doing all night while I was getting smashed, they'll answer something like, "Oh, standing by the bar trying to get the bartender's attention." So it's like we SORT OF hung out, but not really.
Hahaha, I kid, I kid. My guy friends are the best. They may not understand why I randomly burst into tears every so often and they might make fun of my neediness but they've seen me through the best and my literal worst times. From them, I've learned how to laugh at myself and not to take things so damn seriously. And because of that, my life has probably been extended another 10-some years. Thanks, dudes.Labels: dudes, friends, friendships, i used to be high strung but then they told me to stop it because it made me ugly, kick-ass, momma