"Are you still friends with that boy?"
"Yes, Mom. I am."
"How long has it been now?"
"A couple of months now?"
"Are you going to break up with him soon?"
"WHAT?!"
"Are you going to break up with him soon?"
"Mom! What are you talking about?"
"Are you a lesbian?"
...
"Is that why you always break up with the boys?"
"How does that even make sense, Mom!? If I broke up with a guy and started dating another guy, that doesn't make me a lesbian!"
"No, but it might mean you're a lesbian."
My mother has no tact whatsoever. I guess that explains why I'm the way I am.
It's not the first time she's asked me if I'm homosexual. She tries to do it nonchalantly, but it ends up being more comical than anything.
* * *
I never believed the women who said that as they got older, they started developing friendships with their mother. I couldn't ever see that with my mom and me. The kind of relationship we had when I was growing up consisted of her telling me what to do and how to do it. And on very rare occasions, she would tell me the boys I dated were ugly. I just couldn't imagine us being friends. We had nothing in common.
But of course, like everything I've been wrong about, I'm also wrong about my mom and I becoming friends. I don't know what the catalyst was or when it started but I know that whatever is happening, is the product of years of bad communication finally turning good.
Or maybe it was the desire to connect with somebody who's known you your entire life and has loved you unconditionally even when you drove them to the brink of insanity.
In retrospect, I knew nothing about myself and she knew everything about everything. So to finally accept that piece of truth and let her into my life as an ally is humbling.
What if she's right about me being a lesbian?! Wouldn't I know if I am or if I'm not?
* * *
"Well, if you like boys, maybe your problem is that you need to be more ladylike. And talk less. And be less of a smartass," my mom commented recently when inquiring about my sorry love life.
Labels: momma, my mom is an older and prettier version of me...is that sad?, my mom thinks i'm a lesbian because i can't be in a relationship for longer than a year, whoever thought we would become friends